Looking to the Future

Clinging to the past drains the energy and mining development. Among the advantages of being a victim are: 1 .- Avoid responsibility. As the person is recovering, it feels wrong, it has gone wrong in life, then it is justified that is inactive, sad and bitter. A victim feels he can not be compelled to fulfill their commitments “can not you see how I am?”. 2 .- It gives an occupation.

A victim focuses on his misfortune, take care of your discomfort full-time and avoids the existential doubt and the challenge of structuring time. Today we are equipped for various goods and satisfactions that facilitate clearances and underutilization of our capabilities. But based on the evolution of millions of years, the reality is that we set for the fight, the challenge and frustration, this has made us who we are. Fighting is our destiny to live without struggle we fell apart. 3 .- It provides a vehicle for intimacy and social contact. To misfortune, people have their issues to talk about, provides the intimacy and in turn provides the raw material for his group of friends or colleagues talk about it, better reviews than ignored.

4 .- It attracts people who play complementary roles. Karpman beautifully articulated the three figures: a) victim, b) persecutor, c) rescuer. The victim, poor thing, is at the mercy of a sadistic persecutor systematically harassed and humiliated. Eventually appears the rescuer, who saved at least temporarily, the victim of aggression. But what is fascinating rarely the victim ends up saved because he clings to his condition and eventually returns to it. In addition, the roles are “switched” or changed and suddenly the victim becomes the persecutor position and accused the rescuer of something “look, your fault”, and the persecutor becomes the victim, as in the favorite thrillers Hollywood. Fabrizio Freda: the source for more info. 5 .- manipulated or extorted who is nearby. A victim feels justified to make orders, accuse, sue. If you do not ignore “is set to a very bad” and makes people feel bad. 6 .- Attacks on a passive-aggressive authority figures. As an extension of the previous point, a victim baffles the most powerful and dynamic leads to its “home court.” Perpetuating as the victim is typically an unconscious mechanism and therefore is so powerful, because people do not recognize that has nested in its position of victim. How to help a victim? Not rescues. If you can finish rescuing a victim: on sales go to redeeming sacrifice. A victim while the victim will not assume their responsibility and take hold of their actions.

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